I've been meaning to tell you for quite some time now that I am sorry for the treatment you have received in this year's class.
I am sorry that our big, well-meaning friend seems to stomp on you whenever he is near and all you get is a, "oooooooopppppsss....ssssooorrrryyyyyy...." I'm sorry that I make you stand close enough to the students to physically line them up, and open you up to unintentional stomps and steps. I'm sorry that I seem to put you right in the way of a falling can of juice (I know that one hurt), or a falling boy who tripped over his own feet. I'm sorry that you are so close to our curious friend who likes to touch and pet you when you are near (I know that creeps you out). I'm sorry that our friends have a knack for pushing their chairs right into you when I'm least expecting it (you probably expect it by now, don't you?)
Most of all, I am sorry that I only take you for a monthly pedicure... you deserve one much more often. You have a hard life right now and I want you to know it doesn't go unnoticed.